aUniversity of California Merced, Merced, California, USA; bMontclair State University, Montclair,<\/p>\n\n\n\n
California, USA<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ABSTRACT<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This mixed-methods study examines 20 adult Hong Kong Adoptees (HKADs) with an average age of 53.7years who attended a Gathering of HKADs in Hong Kong. It has three elements (pre- and post-Gathering surveys and an interview). All participants engaged in two of the three parts of the study, while 14 of those 20 participated in all three parts. Survey data for the HKADs revealed significantly increased comfort with their Hong Kong identities following the visit to Hong Kong. Interviews with 20 attendees yielded themes sur- rounding reasons for attending; experiences and emotions; and the challenges and benefits of the gathering and return- ing to Hong Kong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Introduction<\/p>\n\n\n\n
ARTICLE HISTORY<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Received 8 August 2019 Revised 16 June 2020 Accepted 17 June 2020<\/p>\n\n\n\n
KEYWORDS<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hong Kong adoptees; adoptee gathering; return to birth country; transnational adoption<\/p>\n\n\n\n
This mixed-methods study examines a 2015 gathering of adult Hong Kong Adoptees (HKADs) that took place in Hong Kong. Although they are one of the oldest groups of transnational adoptees, HKADs are a vastly understudied population in the adoption community. Hong Kong\u2019s adoption history has led to a cohort of HKADs that was primarily in their middle adulthood, which means they are also from a different adoption generation than post-1990 Chinese adoptees from mainland China. Although identity is widely recognized as lifelong, the very limited explo- rations of other transnational adoptee gatherings have centered Korean adoptees in their early adulthood (e.g., early 30s) with focus on their adoptive, racial, and cultural identity (Freundlich & Lieberthal, 2000; Park Nelson et al., 2013), whereas this study explores adoptees who attended a Gathering when nearly all were in their 50s, Erikson\u2019s middle adulthood (Erikson, 1968).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
CONTACT Kit Myers kmyers6@ucmerced.edu History & Critical Race and Ethnic Studies, SSHA, University of California Merced, 5200 N. Lake Road, Merced, CA 95343-5001, USA 2 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For these adoptees, who were primarily women adopted in the early to mid-1960s from Hong Kong to the USA, the UK, and Canada, we sought to explore the aspects of their identity, feelings about Hong Kong, and their experiences interacting with other HKADs and returning to Hong Kong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Theoretical frameworks that guided our work come from both develop- mental psychology and adoption-based theory. Within the psychology lit- erature, Erikson\u2019s (1968) work on life stages has rooted identity within adolescence and predicts that adults in their 50s are typically coping with concerns around generativity and meaning-making in the course of one\u2019s life. Although identity is now recognized as a lifelong process, we theorized that identity and generativity concerns were overlapping (Erikson & Erikson, 1981) for our sample of HKADs. Additionally, generativity, for this group of HKADs, may express itself beyond procreativity (i.e., not in family and kinship tied to biology or adoption) but instead in building kin- ship and familial bonds with other HKADs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n With respect to adoption, adoptee gatherings may also fulfill cultural socialization needs among transracial and transnational adoptees as iden- tified in other research (Shiao & Tuan, 2008). Baden et al. (2012) have theorized that transnational adoptees\u2019 development is also characterized by efforts to reclaim birth culture through the process they call \u201creculturation\u201d by participating in different reculturative activities such as motherland or heritage tours and adoptee gatherings based on coun- tries of origin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Given the theoretical foundations identified above, we designed and ana- lyzed our study using a mixed-method approach, in which participants completed pre- and post-Gathering surveys for a quantitative comparative analysis and completed one-on-one phenomenological interviews to explore the essence of their experiences returning to Hong Kong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Literature review<\/p>\n\n\n\n Transracial adoption in the USA\u2014generally defined as white families that adopt nonwhite children in either domestic or transnational contexts\u2014 began to increase in the 1960s and came under greater scrutiny in 1972, when the National Association of Black Social Workers (NABSW) raised concerns about cultural genocide, racial identity concerns, and maladjust- ment (National Association of Black Social Workers (NABSW), 1972). Early questions about the outcomes of domestic and transnational trans- racial adoptions led to numerous studies from the 1970s into the 2000s, which concluded that such adoptions were generally beneficial and not significantly different from (and in some cases better than) same-race<\/p>\n\n\n\n adoptions and non-adopted relations in terms of identity development, self-esteem, educational achievement, and other measures (Brooks & Barth, 1999; Grow & Shapiro, 1975; Hamilton et al., 2015; Juffer & Van IJzendoorn, 2007; Feigelman & Silverman, 1984).<\/p>\n\n\n\n At the same time, other studies have shown the difficulties and underly- ing structural issues, racial ethnic identity challenges, and behavioral issues presented by transracial and transnational adoption (Hjern et al., 2002; McKee, 2019; Park Nelson, 2016; Patton, 2000; Raleigh, 2018). Additionally, adoption scholars have noted other limits on earlier research such as centering the perspectives of adoptive parents rather than adult adoptees, interviewing adoptees when they were in the presence of their parents, or only interviewing adoptees as children and not as adults (Feigelman, 2000; Rushton et al., 2012). More contemporary perspectives on transnational placements have advocated domestic adoption within birth countries (Cheney, 2014; Groza & Bunkers, 2014).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Although scholars have produced insightful research on transnational adoption, especially on the challenges and resilience of transnational and transracial adoptees (Baden et al., 2012), the experiences of individuals adopted from Hong Kong have been understudied. Additionally, literature directly addressing adoptee life stage development tends to be quite limited in its predictions for life stage developmental issues after young adulthood (Hajal & Rosenberg, 1991), further illustrating the need to better under- stand the middle to later life stages among adoptees. Furthermore, while many studies focus on adoption outcomes, less is known about how adult adoptees\u2014in this case HKADs\u2014connect with each other and what they experience at all-adoptee gatherings.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Hong Kong adoptees<\/p>\n\n\n\n Transnational adoptions in the USA began post-World War II from European countries such as Germany, Poland, Hungary, Greece, and Italy (Choy, 2013; Winslow, 2017). They increased in the mid-1950s after the \u201cend\u201d of the Korean War (Kim, 2010). Scholarly research has centered adoptions from Korea during this time, but in 1958 and 1959, International Social Services (ISS)-United States and ISS-United Kingdom began facilitat- ing adoptions from Hong Kong to the USA, UK, and other countries (Bryer, 2012; Choy, 2013). By 1961, after the first postwar census, Hong Kong\u2019s population exploded to from 1.8 million post-WWII to 3.1 million people due to many Chinese leaving mainland China after the establish- ment of the People\u2019s Republic of China in 1949, with more than 50 percent (1.64 million) being migrants (Ching, 1974). An estimated 700,000 refugees fled to Hong Kong in 1956 (Feast et al., 2013) and 300,000 people lived on<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 3<\/p>\n\n\n\n 4 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n the streets (Bryer, 2012). ISS reports indicated that this led to poverty and overcrowding, and contributed to increases in children being abandoned or relinquished in Hong Kong (Feast et al., 2013).<\/p>\n\n\n\n In what was called the \u201cHong Kong Project,\u201d ISS-USA and ISS-UK ini- tially sought to match children with other Chinese families abroad, but eventually realized that white families were also interested in adopting Chinese babies (Bryer, 2012; Choy, 2013). In a four-year period, from 1958 to 1962, families in the USA adopted approximately 700 children from Hong Kong (Special to the New York Times, 1962). By 1970, families in the UK adopted a total of 106 children from Hong Kong (Feast et al., 2013). The geographical proximity and temporal bracketing of the UK adoptions made that particular cohort the target of the few and only stud- ies on HKADs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Bagley and Young\u2019s (1979) mixed-methods study was the first to examine the experiences of UK Hong Kong adoptees and their adoptive parents. With a sample size of 40 families (40 parents and 42 adopted children), researchers focused on identity development, adaptation in school, motiv- ation to adopt, cultural inclusion, and relationships. Using Maslow\u2019s hier- archy of needs, the Coppersmith measure of self-esteem, and Erikson\u2019s developmental model, researchers concluded that UK HKADs faced some discrimination (even in the extended family) but in general had \u201cAnglicised\u201d well. Researchers noted that in comparison with their non- adopted counterparts, HKADs achieved similarly if not better on educa- tional and self-esteem measures, and overcame early challenges (e.g., age at placement, congenital difficulties, divorce). Bagley (1993) conducted a fol- low-up study when the HKADS were 22 to 28 years old and reported that the HKADs did well in terms of educational and occupational achievement; identified as English with half maintaining an interest in Chinese culture; and the vast majority \u201cenjoyed [their] life as an adopted child\u201d (91%) (p. 153).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Feast et al. (2013) conducted a mixed-methods study of 72 HKAD women (72 questionnaires and 68 interviewed) adopted to the UK in the 1960s. The authors explored the links among early orphanage experiences, life span development, and adult outcomes; comparisons with other adopted and non-adopted women born in the UK; and the experiences of transracial intercountry adoption, ethnic identity formation, and commu- nity connectedness. The study reported that HKADs generally fared well. As children, they received orphanage care that compared favorably to that found among other transnational adoptee groups. Most HKADs grew up in nurturing homes but some experienced problematic psychological adjust- ment due to family dynamics. Even though HKADs reported limited con- nectedness to Chinese communities as well as struggles with alienation,<\/p>\n\n\n\n identity (e.g., being comfortable with Chinese appearance), and racism, the vast majority (86%) felt a sense of belonging within British society. In com- parison with other adopted and non-adopted groups, HKADs\u2019 life satisfac- tion scores were nearly identical, and they sought professional psychological and emotional support at a similar or slightly lower rate. Still, one of the main takeaways was that \u201cadoption continues to have an impact across the life span and for some women that becomes more salient as time goes by and at certain periods in their lives\u201d (pp. 2\u201313, 218).<\/p>\n\n\n\n A ramification of the complexity and lifelong impact of adoption as well as the differences and feelings of not belonging has been that many trans- national adoptees have begun to formulate gatherings as a way of increas- ing connectedness and community among other adoptees. Thus, while this limited research on the early experiences, adjustments, and outcomes of HKADs has been important, this study focuses on the aspects of identity but also the experience and significance of the 2015 HKAD Gathering.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Transnational adoptee gatherings<\/p>\n\n\n\n Currently, there is no research focusing on HKADs Gatherings, but there have been two studies on Korean adoptee (KAD) Gatherings (Freundlich & Lieberthal, 2000; Park Nelson et al., 2013). In 1999, nearly 400 Korean adoptees met in Washington, D.C. for the first major Gathering for any transnational adoptee group. In small groups, attendees discussed reasons for attending the Gathering, early memories of Korea and arrival to new homes, and early life experiences. Of the attendees, 167 KAD attendees (mean age 31years) participated in a qualitative survey exploring demographics, ethnic identity, Korean heritage, adoption stories, birth search, reasons for attending gatherings, and connectedness to Korea (Freundlich & Lieberthal, 2000). At another KAD Gathering in 2010, the International Korean Adoptee Association (IKAA) commissioned a survey for the Gathering, which took place in Seoul, South Korea. Of the 415 KADs who attended, 179 (mean age of 34years) participated in the 23-item survey. This brief survey covered demographics, pre-adoption experiences, life experiences, ethnic identity, and post-adoption service interests (Park Nelson et al., 2013). Since the initial KAD Gathering in 1999, there have been numerous large and small KAD gatherings. Importantly, though, neither study examined the significance of the Gathering or how it may have affected participants.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In 2010, a group of HKADs met in Hong Kong for the first \u201cChinese Adult Adoptee Worldwide Reunion.\u201d Many HKADs who attended kept in contact, which led to the establishment of the Hong Kong Adoptees Network (HKAN), which consists of transnational Hong Kong adoptee groups with the primary group being in the UK. The purpose of HKAN is<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 5<\/p>\n\n\n\n 6 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n to \u201cbuild connections with adoptees locally [from the UK] and meet for events, gatherings & reunions,\u201d while also connecting with other \u201cinternational HKAN groups\u201d (Hong Kong Adoptees Network, n.d., para. 1). Although the experiences of the HKAD Gathering might be different due to the difference in circumstances and context of their adoptions, com- monalities are also likely to exist between the HKAD and KAD commun- ities. It is important to examine the experiences of HKADs to better understand their unique challenges and resiliency as older adoptees, many of which were adopted into same-race families. Moreover, it is important to examine the potential benefits of gatherings for all transnationally adopted populations. In addition, this study examined why adoptees chose to attend the Gathering, the emotions experienced at the Gathering, and the significance of returning to Hong Kong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Gathering in Hong Kong<\/p>\n\n\n\n Attendees for the Gathering came from multiple countries as identified in Table 1, though two HKADs adopted to the UK were living in China and Hong Kong, respectively. Most of the HKADs who attended stayed one week, while many stayed longer. The Gathering was loosely structured around four main activities done as a large group: 1) visits to former child- ren\u2019s homes and orphanages; 2) meeting at University of Hong Kong for large group sharing and discussion; 3) visiting International Social Services to learn about root tracing; and 4) a large sit-down dinner. The remainder of the week consisted of medium-to-small group outings such as going to finding sites, shopping, night markets, museums, and tourist spots. Former orphanages included Po Leung Kuk, the Children\u2019s Reception Center, Fanling, and St. Christopher\u2019s. Po Leung Kuk and the Children\u2019s Reception Center still exist but have been repurposed with different functions. Fanling and St. Christopher\u2019s were demolished many years prior, but the group visited the sites of the homes. Many attendees chose to also apply for Hong Kong I.D. cards, or permanent residency cards that are akin to citizenship with the right to abode in Hong Kong. These residence cards are granted upon proof of birth in Hong Kong.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Present study<\/p>\n\n\n\n In the current mixed-methods study, participants completed survey items prior to the Gathering, face-to-face interviews at the Gathering in Hong Kong, and survey items after the Gathering. In this article, we will report on both quantitative and qualitative data that were gathered. The research questions for this study are as follows:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Table 1. Descriptive statistics and self-reported ethnicity of HKADs. Chinese English<\/p>\n\n\n\n American<\/p>\n\n\n\n Have searched\/in process<\/p>\n\n\n\n Made Contact with Birth Family<\/p>\n\n\n\n Partnered\/Married<\/p>\n\n\n\n Spouse white\/Caucasian<\/p>\n\n\n\n Visited HK Prior to Gathering as Adults<\/p>\n\n\n\n American British Canadian English from HK<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 7<\/p>\n\n\n\n Age range USA Non-USA UK Type of adoption<\/p>\n\n\n\n TRA (Both white)<\/p>\n\n\n\n Same-race (at least one Asian parent)<\/p>\n\n\n\n Identity as An Adult<\/p>\n\n\n\n Asian-American Chinese<\/p>\n\n\n\n 50to61 55.3 years 93% 2.6 years 29% 57%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 57% 36%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 7%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 50% 50% n1\u2044414a 7.1% 14.3% 28.6% 14.3% 7.1%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 7.1% 7.1% 7.1%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 7.1% 50% 7.1% 85.7% 85.7% 100%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 38 to 57 3.5 years 17% 45% 55% 33% 35% 17% 10% 33% 10%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 50% 55% 50% 45% n1\u204446b n1\u2044420c<\/p>\n\n\n\n 5% 17% 15% 17% 25% 10% 17% 10%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 17% 5% 5% 5%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 17% 10% 17% 5% 5%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 33% 45% 0% 5% 50% 70% 100% 90% 100% 95%<\/p>\n\n\n\n 38 to 61 53.7 years<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2.7 years<\/p>\n\n\n\n Note: Gathering survey. Methods<\/p>\n\n\n\n In this study, we utilized a phenomenological qualitative and a comparison analysis quantitative approach to collect and analyze the data. The phenom- enological approach aimed to explore the lived experiences of HKADs who<\/p>\n\n\n\n 8 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n attended the gathering to understand the essence of their experience (Creswell & Poth, 2017; Merriam & Tisdell, 2015). In addition, we also employed quantitative methods to collect and analyze the data, that is, a pre- and post-Gathering test comparative analysis of attendees. This mixed- methods approach allowed participants an opportunity to reconcile their experiences before, during, and after the gathering. Moreover, a mixed- methods approach offered authors the possibility to measure the impact of HKAD gatherings on the HKAD population.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Participants<\/p>\n\n\n\n After obtaining permission from the organizers of the 2015 HKAD Gathering to recruit for this study, the organizers contacted those interested in attending the Gathering with our recruitment letter. Of the 30 adoptees attending the Gathering, 73% (n1\u2044422) agreed to participate in our study. We conducted interviews with 67% (n1\u2044420) of the HKAD attendees in Hong Kong during the latter portion of the Gathering. Seventy percent (n1\u2044421) completed the pre-Gathering survey, whereas 57% (n1\u2044417) com- pleted the post-Gathering survey. Forty-seven percent (n 1\u20444 14) HKAD attendees completed all study-related measures and interviews, and an add- itional 20% (n1\u204446) were interviewed and completed the pre-Gathering sur- vey but not the post-Gathering survey. For the purpose of this study, we reported the demographic details on the 20 attendees (all of whom were interviewed) from the pre-Gathering survey in Table 1 including data grouped based on which measures were completed. Analyses for pre- and post-Gathering data were conducted with the 14 attendees. Individuals who only completed one measure were not included. All interviewees and sur- vey respondents were adopted from Hong Kong and of Chinese descent, and their mean age was 53.7 with a median age of 55 for all respondents. Interviewees were given pseudonyms to protect their identity. See Table 1 for more information about the 20 participants who attended the Gathering based on their pre-Gathering survey responses. Respondents who were interviewed completed some combination of the Gathering sur- veys, which are measures developed for this study that reported on multiple items regarding their connections to Hong Kong, their Hong Kong identi- ties, and their experiences prior to the Gathering in the pre-Gathering sur- vey in Table 2.<\/p>\n\n\n\n As displayed in Table 1, the attendees of the Hong Kong Gathering were raised in four different countries, and nine were raised in same-race fami- lies (i.e., at least one adoptive parent was also Chinese), whereas 11 were raised in transracial adoptive families. The mean age of the adoptees in the current study was 53.7years (SD1\u204445.77) illustrating the older life stage at<\/p>\n\n\n\n Table 2. Descriptive statistics for pretest and posttest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 9<\/p>\n\n\n\n All participants<\/p>\n\n\n\n n M<\/p>\n\n\n\n 20 8.0 20 4.73 20 5.60 20 7.94 20 8.70<\/p>\n\n\n\n 20 6.56<\/p>\n\n\n\n 20 8.61<\/p>\n\n\n\n 20 4.45<\/p>\n\n\n\n n M<\/p>\n\n\n\n 17 9.18 17 9.06<\/p>\n\n\n\n 16 5.69<\/p>\n\n\n\n 16 5.81 16 6.44 15 7.20 15 9.13<\/p>\n\n\n\n 14 7.07<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3 4.00<\/p>\n\n\n\n 15 8.87<\/p>\n\n\n\n 15 4.53 14 8.64<\/p>\n\n\n\n 12 8.17 9 3.33<\/p>\n\n\n\n Attendees (completed all measures and interviews)<\/p>\n\n\n\n Pre-Gathering<\/p>\n\n\n\n Comfort with Identity as HK Adoptee<\/p>\n\n\n\n Degree to which Identify with Hong Kong<\/p>\n\n\n\n Degree to which Identify with Being Chinese Importance of Visiting<\/p>\n\n\n\n Hong Kong Importance of Info About<\/p>\n\n\n\n Orphanage\/<\/p>\n\n\n\n Personal History Importance of Info About<\/p>\n\n\n\n or Meeting<\/p>\n\n\n\n Birth Family Attending<\/p>\n\n\n\n the Gathering the Gathering Post-Gathering HK Adoptee Hong Kong ID Card DNA Testing Interest Root Tracing Interest Search Interest Importance of Visiting<\/p>\n\n\n\n Hong Kong Satisfied Orphanage\/<\/p>\n\n\n\n Personal History Info Satisfied Finding Birth<\/p>\n\n\n\n Family Info the Gathering Anxiety about Gathering Expectations Met<\/p>\n\n\n\n for Gathering Experiences Match<\/p>\n\n\n\n Expectations for Return<\/p>\n\n\n\n to HK Experiences Match<\/p>\n\n\n\n Expectations for Birth Search<\/p>\n\n\n\n SD nsub 2.15 14<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2.07 14 2.91 14 2.46 14 1.89 14<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3.20 14<\/p>\n\n\n\n 1.67 14<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2.30 14<\/p>\n\n\n\n SD nsub 1.02 14 1.09 14<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3.55 13<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3.54 13 3.29 13 3.12 13 1.81 12<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2.64 11<\/p>\n\n\n\n 5.20 2<\/p>\n\n\n\n 1.51 12<\/p>\n\n\n\n 3.68 12 2.59 11<\/p>\n\n\n\n 1.99 10 3.00 8<\/p>\n\n\n\n Msub SDsub 7.57 2.24<\/p>\n\n\n\n 4.86 2.25 5.57 2.68 8.06 2.31 9.00 2.00<\/p>\n\n\n\n 7.65 2.59<\/p>\n\n\n\n 8.94 .92<\/p>\n\n\n\n 4.14 2.32<\/p>\n\n\n\n Msub SDsub 9.21 1.05 9.07 1.14<\/p>\n\n\n\n 6.62 3.25<\/p>\n\n\n\n 6.23 3.77 7.38 2.72 7.54 3.23 9.42 1.24<\/p>\n\n\n\n 6.73 2.61<\/p>\n\n\n\n 1.00 0.0<\/p>\n\n\n\n 8.75 1.63<\/p>\n\n\n\n 5.42 3.58 8.27 2.83<\/p>\n\n\n\n 8.40 1.90 3.63 3.07<\/p>\n\n\n\n which these adoptees attended this Gathering in comparison with an aver- age age of 34 (Freundlich & Lieberthal, 2000) and 31 (Park Nelson et al., 2013) for the past Korean adoptee Gatherings.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Measures<\/p>\n\n\n\n Pre-gathering survey<\/p>\n\n\n\n This 41-item survey was created for this study by the authors. The items included background demographic items (e.g., age, education, and<\/p>\n\n\n\n 10 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n occupation) as well as seven items rated on a Likert scale of 1 to 10 with higher scores indicating positive assessments. Some example items are as follows: (a) How important is visiting Hong Kong to you? (2) How com- fortable do you feel with your Hong Kong identity? and (3) How much anxiety are you feeling about attending the Gathering? This survey also contained four open-ended items such as \u201cIn one paragraph (4\u00025 senten- ces), how has your life been affected by your adoption?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Semi-structured interview<\/p>\n\n\n\n A detailed semi-structured interview guide was created by the authors con- sisting of 20 items. These questions covered issues ranging from partici- pants\u2019 adoption stories, memories of their orphanages, expectations for the Gathering, impressions of the Gathering, and desire to search for first\/ birth families.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Post-gathering survey<\/p>\n\n\n\n This 25-item survey, created for this study, included 14 Likert scale items (scoring 1 to 10 on each), including a post-assessment of anxiety, satisfac- tion with the Gathering, and importance of visiting their birth country. Six open-ended items were also included regarding the impact of the trip on participants\u2019 identity, their expectations for first\/birth relative searches, and the difficult and best parts of the trip.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For the purpose of this study, we are reporting on only a portion of the survey and interview data.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Procedure<\/p>\n\n\n\n Following approval from two university institutional review boards, we recruited participants using the listserv developed for the HKAD 2015 Gathering. Both the pre- and post-Gathering surveys were developed by the authors for this study and included demographic questions about the attendees and their adoptions. Likert scale items were added to provide metrics for HKADs\u2019 self-assessments of their feelings and attitudes to the Gathering, their identities, and their relationships to their adoptions. These study-created measures were not previously validated and were first used in this study. The surveys were posted using the online data collection plat- form, Qualtrics. Volunteer participants completed the pre-Gathering survey during the three weeks prior to the Gathering and those attending the Gathering scheduled in-person interviews with the two lead researchers and were audio recorded. All interviews took place in Hong Kong during the week of the Gathering. Three months following the Gathering, we<\/p>\n\n\n\n prompted participants via e-mail to complete an online post-Gathering sur- vey. Interviews were recorded and then transcribed using a transcription service and a college student trained in transcriptions.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Researcher stance<\/p>\n\n\n\n The two primary authors identify as HKADs. One is from a similar gener- ation and cohort as the vast majority of the HKADs in the study, whereas the other researcher was in his early to mid-30s at the time of the study. One of the primary authors is also an adoptive parent. A third author is a recent doctoral graduate in Counseling who has worked on numerous adoption-related research projects.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Design and analysis<\/p>\n\n\n\n This study used a mixed-methods design and featured pre- and post- Gathering surveys of attendees\u2019 evaluations of their attitudes, feelings, and actions primarily related to their experiences with Hong Kong and the Gathering as well as face-to-face interviews to answer the research ques- tions. The two surveys and the interview of each participant provided three data points of the attendees to create a holistic overview of the HKADs\u2019 Gathering experiences, thoughts, and feelings prior to, during, and after the Gathering. The quantitative items from the pre-Gathering and post- Gathering surveys were analyzed at the Montclair State University (MSU) Adoption Research Team lab using statistical software, SPSS version 23.0, and the qualitative findings were analyzed at the University of California, Merced and MSU using another software package, Nvivo version 11. For our first research question, we used conventional descriptive statistics (Sandelowski, 2000) and paired samples t-tests to determine pre- and post- Gathering differences and tested to ensure assumptions were met. For our other three research questions, we used a phenomenological approach and thematic (Braun & Clarke, 2006) analysis to examine the qualitative data. The authors did not begin with predetermined themes or codes and instead separately developed detailed codes for the transcribed interview data using Nvivo. This produced a coding hierarchy that resulted in more than 230 codes of which 40 were broader themed parent nodes. Underneath the par- ent nodes were 174 detailed child nodes, and 19 were neither parent nor child nodes. Many of these nodes covered personal background and other aspects of their adoption that were discussed but not the focus of this study. We focused on coded nodes that included at least three or four sour- ces and then determined their salience in relation to our research ques- tions. Many of the nodes were not included in this study but might be<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 11<\/p>\n\n\n\n 12 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n interesting to use as a starting point for follow-up studies. Furthermore, authors facilitated an inter-reliability test through Nvivo and had a Kappa of .44, or fair to good agreement.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Trustworthiness<\/p>\n\n\n\n In this study, trustworthiness was verified through triangulation, direct quotes from the participants, and bracketing. Triangulation was accom- plished through the involvement of multiple researchers during the data analysis process. Using Nvivo, two authors used descriptive and thematic coding analysis to identify representative quotes from the participants. These two authors then cross checked their coding analysis to authenticate accuracy and consistency of the data collected (Creswell & Poth, 2017). The third author served as an external auditor and provided additional tri- angulation through cross checking for accuracy, consistency, and enforced trustworthiness (Creswell & Poth, 2017). Authors also used direct quotes from participants that provided detailed descriptions of thematic findings and supported the transferability and trustworthiness of the findings. In addition, member checking, a common form of validating trustworthiness in qualitative studies, was utilized. Moreover, authors utilized bracketing before, during, and after interactions with participants. Epoche (bracketing) occurred when authors journaled or processed their thoughts and opinions during the research process to set biases aside. Bracketing decreased the likelihood of potential findings being affected by biases and strengthened the trustworthiness of the study (Finlay, 2009; Young, 2017).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Results<\/p>\n\n\n\n We compiled detailed information on our sample of HKAD attendees from the pre- and post-Gathering surveys as seen in Tables 1 and 2. Table 1 reports separately the information on the 14 HKADs who completed both pre- and post-HKAD Gathering surveys and interview as well as the total sample of 20. These findings indicate that the HKAD attendees use various self-labels to identify their ethnicity and nationality with the majority of them combining ethnicity and nationality (e.g., Chinese American).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Table 2 contains descriptive statistics for respondents\u2019 reports on mul- tiple items regarding their connections to Hong Kong, their Hong Kong identities, and their experiences prior to the Gathering in the pre- Gathering survey. With respect to factors that may have influenced HKADs\u2019 decisions to attend the Gathering, HKADs reported that visiting Hong Kong was somewhat high in importance to them. HKADs also reported that their identification with Hong Kong and with being Chinese<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 13<\/p>\n\n\n\n Figure 1. Pre- and post-Gathering means and standard deviations for HKAD attendees. Note: n 1\u20444 14. \u0003p<.05<\/p>\n\n\n\n was in the low-moderate and moderate range. In contrast, however, HKADs reported somewhat high levels of comfort with their identities as Hong Kong adoptees. The other factors that the HKADs reported were their high level of interest in attaining information about their orphanages or personal history and their moderately high interest in searching for or meeting birth\/first families.<\/p>\n\n\n\n To answer our first research question regarding differences between pre- and post-HKAD Gathering survey ratings, we used the four Likert-scale items that the attendees (n1\u2044414) completed (Figure 1). Using paired sam- ples t-tests analyses, we conducted comparisons between pre- and post- Gathering responses for the HKADs. The Shapiro-Wilks test of normality (p 1\u20444 .093) assessed that our sample was normally distributed and all other assumptions for paired samples t-tests were met. Our findings indicated increases in mean scores for the four items that were measured pre- and post-Gathering (see Figure 1). HKADs reported significant (t(13) 1\u20444 \u00022.43, p < .03) increases of 1.5 degrees, 95% CI (\u20132.84, \u00020.17) of self-rated com- fort with their Hong Kong identities according to the paired samples t-test with an effect size of .65. Although not statistically significant, HKADs also reported increases in their beliefs about the importance of visiting Hong Kong. With respect to emotions about the Gathering, HKADs reported feeling a low-to-moderate amount of anxiety prior to attending the Gathering, and after the Gathering reported a lessening of their anxiety about the Gathering, albeit not significant. Similarly, attendees were posi- tive toward the Gathering both prior to and after the Gathering and no sig- nificant differences were found.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 14 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Figure 2. Themes and subthemes in HKAD interviews.<\/p>\n\n\n\n HKADs\u2019 reported increased comfort with their Hong Kong adoptee iden- tities after the Gathering may be reflected in their interest in applying for their Hong Kong Identity\/Residence Cards. As seen in Table 2, HKADs\u2019 interest in DNA testing, root tracing, and searching for birth family contact was also reported.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Thematic analysis findings<\/p>\n\n\n\n Our analysis of the interview transcripts resulted in three main themes with multiple subthemes as depicted in Figure 2. To de-identify interview- ees, countries of residence and ages are not included for this small sample.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Theme: Reasons for attending the gathering in HK<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: Meet and connect. HKADs offered many reasons for attending the Gathering, but the most common response (n1\u2044416) was to meet and con- nect with other HKADs. Elaine (TRA, indicates transracial adoption), des- pite knowing other HKADs while growing up, said she simply liked the \u201cidea of meeting other adoptees,\u201d or as Remy (TRA) stated, she wanted to\u201cmeet other adoptees from Hong Kong from all different parts of the world\u201d and \u201chear their stories.\u201d For Gayle (SRA, indicates same-race adop- tion), this social aspect of the Gathering was the key component: \u201cYes, it\u2019s that connection. It could have been in America and could have been in the UK. To me, it didn\u2019t make any difference … I could have gone to the<\/p>\n\n\n\n States, Australia, anywhere for this reunion and it would not have made any difference.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: Seeing \u201cour homeland.\u201d. In addition to meeting and connecting with other HKADs, nine stated that being in and seeing Hong Kong was important. \u201cHong Kong is our homeland,\u201d Beth (TRA) stated, \u201cSo to have that kind of Gathering in our homeland, I knew it was going to be special.\u201d From the survey data, attendees had been to HK on average 2.2 times, but the range was zero (n1\u204441) to more than 10 times (n1\u204442). Additionally, nearly all of the previous trips were because of work (n 1\u20444 4), including the two who had been more than 10 times; as a tourist or on family vacations (n1\u204448); or to visit other adoptive family (n1\u204444). A few HKADs (n1\u204443) explicitly noted that time was running out for many of them who were older and because of age, health, or budget might not get another oppor- tunity like this again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: \u201cFeet on the ground\u201d for root tracing and birth search. The previous trips to HK for work and vacation meant this trip held greater personal meaning for many HKADs. Eight respondents wanted to do root tracing to learn more about their personal history. For Jackeline (SRA), the trip gave her the chance to see her birthplace and have her \u201cfeet on the ground\u201d to make better progress on tracing her personal history with the help of the larger group. Additionally, seven expressed wanting to do a birth search while attending the Gathering. Nicole (TRA) noted that being in Hong Kong as a group, they could use each other as resources:<\/p>\n\n\n\n I felt like this was going to be the most important and significant reunion that I could go to because it is in Hong Kong, my birthplace, and that as a group, there would be the support to pursue our searches. Because I think when I have tried to do things alone, I don\u2019t get very far. With us being here and as a large group, we had more resources available for us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Vanesa (SRA) similarly stated that HKADs \u201chave pieces of the puzzle\u201d that she needs, adding, \u201cIt\u2019s my fourth trip back, but it\u2019s never been for root tracing, orphanage, or my identity.\u201d Natalie (SRA), who wanted to find her birth certificate and apply for her Hong Kong I.D. card, added that it is easier to do this and birth searching in person: \u201c[I]f you are in search of your own, it also can save you some time to circumvent some of the systems to get to where your end result is. I mean why spend 4days doing something when you can cut it down to 1?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: Multiple reasons. The vast majority of HKADs gave multiple rea- sons from the list above for attending. They mentioned wanting to meet other people who \u201cwere like me\u201d; find out if others had childhood<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 15<\/p>\n\n\n\n 16 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n experiences \u201csimilar to mine\u201d; \u201cget to know their stories\u201d; and \u201chear differ- ent people\u2019s struggles\u201d (Natalie, SRA; Remy, TRA; Frank, SRA). As Wendy (TRA) put it, \u201cI knew that it would be a unique opportunity to be with other Hong Kong adoptees.\u201d While this appears to be a mundane quote, the \u201cbe with other Hong Kong adoptees\u201d should not be overlooked. Many HKADs relayed experiences of not only growing up in isolated and alienat- ing environments but also living their whole lives without knowing other HKADs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Diving into more specific reasons for attending, Remy (TRA), for example, was interested in similarities such as, \u201cHow many more were from the same orphanage that I was at, and if so, were we of the same [or] similar age group that maybe we knew each other?\u201d She was also looking for \u201cadoptees that had not so good matches\u201d similar to her own experien- ces. While it might be easy to identify Remy\u2019s reasoning as an outlier, it resembles what Natalie said in \u201chearing people\u2019s struggle.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Theme: Experiences and emotions while attending the gathering<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: Visiting orphanages\u2014\u201cI have a connection here.\u201d. One of the high- lights for HKADs was visiting the various orphanage sites. Given the older average age (2.7years) and range of age (1 to 7years) at adoption for HKADs, their connection to orphanages may have more meaning. Po Leung Kuk was unique in that it was the only orphanage that still existed and was operational. For Gayle (SRA), a highpoint included visiting Po Leung Kuk, where the group met resident toddlers. A few HKADs even had the opportunity to embrace the little ones, which for Gayle was a \u201cmoving experience.\u201d For Jackeline (SRA), in visiting Po Leung Kuk, she appreciated \u201cseeing the spot where I would\u2019ve laid in my crib, seeing the playground I would have played on,\u201d which provided \u201cintangible [sic] evi- dence of my existence here.\u201d The other two orphanages, St Christopher\u2019s and Fanling, were both torn down, a school in place of the former and a fenced grassy space for the latter, but this did not diminish the value of vis- iting these sites. Speaking about the two, Sasha (TRA) stated, \u201cTo be together at St. Christopher\u2019s walking around and then Fanling walking around. I find it just really\u2014like, wow this is where I really was.\u201d Vanessa\u2019s (SRA) visit to Fanling was her first time being back, and even though the building was not there, it left her \u201cspeechless\u201d and unable to put the experi- ence into words. Perhaps Nicole (SRA) summarized it best, \u201cIt didn\u2019t mat- ter [that Fanling was not there] because Saint Christopher\u2019s is not there either … I understand that going to the site is equally as important to those adoptees even if it\u2019s not there anymore. There is something, there is an attachment to that spot.\u201d Kacy (SRA) also revealed the power of visiting Fanling, \u201cWhen we went up to Fanling where the area is, because the<\/p>\n\n\n\n home\u2019s not there, when we went there and took a group picture something happened inside. And it\u2019s the first time I actually felt like I have a connec- tion here and not just as a tourist.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: Meeting other fanlingers. During the group\u2019s visit to the children\u2019s home site where Fanling once stood, the group had the unexpected oppor- tunity to meet five women who had been raised at Fanling but never adopted. A Chinese Hong Kong non-adopted resident who helped several HKADs with root tracing and birth search had arranged the meeting. Teresa said it was \u201camazing\u201d yet \u201craw\u201d for both groups, especially without being prepared for the meeting beforehand. Gayle (SRA) observed, \u201c[T]hey are a very tight-knitted group,\u201d who seemed content and had \u201ceffectively become family themselves.\u201d Confirming this, Natalie (SRA), who is bilin- gual and raised by Chinese parents, stated, \u201cWhen I talked to them in Chinese, they were happy still. That\u2019s the coolest thing. That was the sun- shine out of this whole trip.\u201d While it brought joy for Natalie, it also pro- vided insight for Gayle, offering \u201ca much better picture of the whole part of our lives,\u201d or what HKADs could have been.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: \u201cMixed emotions.\u201d. As one might expect, the Gathering produced a range of emotional experiences for many HKADs. For many, like Nicole (SRA), it spawned joy and laughter, \u201cThe only thing I can tell you is that I have laughed harder than I have laughed in a long time … We actually almost got kicked out of a restaurant two nights ago because we were too loud, and we couldn\u2019t stop laughing.\u201d Or as Reese (TRA) put it, \u201cWe would be able to really laugh and just I think we understood the laughter that we could just have belly laughs.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n For Vanessa (SRA), the Gathering generated an indescribable sadness, \u201cI can\u2019t verbalize the sadness or the feelings that things are triggering … My impression is a lot of mixed emotions. I really feel for some of the men and a lot of the ladies. I can sense in what they say. There is almost a deep hole in some of their hearts and a lot of identity issues.\u201d Nicole (SRA), however, explained her sadness as coming from a place of love, \u201cI am kind of worried about flying home because I am going to be a crying mess all the way back to [home] because I already know that you just leave, and I feel like I am leaving people that I love.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n In another example, Penny (TRA) described herself as emotionally con- trolled except when around other adoptees, \u201cBut for some reason when I\u2019m with other adoptees, I can\u2019t control it. You control it with your brain, but now my heart and soul wants [sic] to come out and I can\u2019t keep it from coming out.\u201d As Elaine (TRA) noted of the large meeting at Hong Kong University, \u201cYou get all the emotions especially when you\u2019re in a bigger<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 17<\/p>\n\n\n\n 18 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n group like we were on Monday. The emotions were high. … I think it\u2019s good to have a big group but you certainly get a better overall picture of what everyone has been through.\u201d As mentioned earlier, most of the HKADs grew up in isolating and alienating environments, so Elaine\u2019s state- ment reveals the emotional effect and importance of being in a large group of people whose experiences reflect your own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: \u201cCollective memory\u201d and \u201cunstated connections.\u201d. The interviews also revealed that the engendered emotions were tied to collective memory and unstated connections with other HKADs. Lana (TRA) explained the importance of these connections, \u201cYeah it\u2019s much much much more force [to be here without her daughters] because we [HKADs] have that collect- ive memory.\u201d She described the Gathering as an emotive experience and that even if she did not remember parts of her past, others might because there was an overlapping experience and history: \u201cThat\u2019s what I wanted. To go through this with people that know what it was like. We were all in the same shoes. … So we all have that understanding.\u201d Nicole (SRA) had simi- lar feelings, \u201cI feel there is this really deep bond, and I think it just has to do with us being adoptees that we understand… there are just some unstated things that we don\u2019t have to explain to each other. I don\u2019t know if I can put it into words.\u201d It might be best summarized when Reese (TRA) thought about why she did not update family and friends during the Gathering:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Yeah, it\u2019s really weird even just thinking about that. I don\u2019t know why I\u2019m emotional. It\u2019s almost like, \u201cHow will they ever understand?\u201d … I think I will tell them some things, but there are some things that feel so unique and intimate. It\u2019s very strange. … But when we\u2019re in the Gathering, then you feel like you\u2019re more free and more comfortable with other adoptees. You don\u2019t have to explain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n These quotes show the interesting strength of adoptee bonds, which are not necessarily built upon close connections with development over time but conceptions of \u201cunstated\u201d shared history, experiences, and therefore understanding of each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: \u201cTransformation\u201d: From alienation to affirmation and belonging. Nested subtheme: Alienation. A few HKADs expressed that they were willing to partake in this study because it did not replicate the recent UK study. For this reason, we focused less on HKADs\u2019 earlier years, their fond memo- ries, and the challenges that they have faced since childhood. Yet, many HKADs still described difficult childhood experiences due to racism (n1\u2044410) and alienation (n1\u204449) from being one of a few (or only) Asian kids in their school or hometown. For example, Frank (SRA), who grew up in a blue-collar city, recalled his Chinese parents wanting him to assimilate<\/p>\n\n\n\n and not speak Chinese. Frank lamented, though, that \u201cyou can\u2019t hide behind this face.\u201d In terms of isolation, Gayle (SRA) stated, \u201c[A]ll through my childhood I felt I was the only child like me. I didn\u2019t realize there were loads and loads of us.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nested subtheme: Disconnection and denial. Additionally, more than a hand- ful (n1\u204448) interviewees expressed a lack of connection on their first and earlier trips to Hong Kong due to loss of language and culture or percep- tion of inauthenticity by local Hong Kongers. Gayle recalled her earlier trip as a young girl to Hong Kong with her adoptive family, \u201cI wasn\u2019t inter- ested. I was sort of standing there thinking what am I doing here? I want to be somewhere else.\u201d For Pam (TRA), being in Hong Kong was estrang- ing, \u201cMy first impression was, my god. All I saw was Chinese people and it was very busy. I said, oh wow. I almost felt like a stranger amongst the people.\u201d Two HKADs explained the disconnect was due to denying their own adopted status. Jackeline (SRA) stated, \u201cI didn\u2019t feel like I had that connection until recently. In fact, it was more of that whole denial that I was subconsciously denying that I was adopted or that I was just, this was my family and so I didn\u2019t really ever have that urge to look for my birth parents.\u201d Jackeline\u2019s quote illustrates how the rejection of one aspect of identity (in this case, adopted status) can overdetermine how one imagines (non)belonging and notions of family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nested subtheme: \u201cI wasn\u2019t alone\u201d and affirming identity and belonging. Being in Hong Kong with other HKADs has produced connections to people and place, both of which have affirmed their identity and sense of belonging. Reese (TRA) explained how she originally did not want to gather in Hong Kong because it felt like a \u201cdistant, almost exotic place,\u201d but by the end of the trip, she felt completely different: \u201cI was really surprised when I came here and realized how important it was to watch these adoptees be here in Hong Kong … . We couldn\u2019t have done it anywhere else and had the kinds and transformations and experiences.\u201d Reese imagined Hong Kong as \u201cexotic,\u201d \u201cinaccessible,\u201d and a \u201cfar away, distant place\u201d so much so that she\u201cdidn\u2019t even feel like [she] was from there.\u201d She later indicated that form- ing intimate connections and visiting finding sites (i.e., locations where HKADs were relinquished and found prior to entering care), in particular, contributed to the unexpected transformative experience of being in Hong Kong. Not only did it bring Reese and others closer to the place of Hong Kong but it also made them more comfortable with their identity:<\/p>\n\n\n\n They were very, very profound and painful sometimes events [of visiting finding sites], but we could socialize and laugh and identify. That\u2019s a really interesting position and it is something that I think is unique and I don\u2019t think you could do<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 19<\/p>\n\n\n\n 20<\/p>\n\n\n\n K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n that with any other group. I feel much better about myself. I feel more confident. … That\u2019s what sometimes happens in a group like this where we have something in common that is so deep and profound and almost non-verbal. … I just had a really negative sense of who I was. I knew that I had a face that I really hated and being stared at or being told that I was different and called names and teased. It was not a positive experience. I didn\u2019t have positive images of Chinese or Asians and then just being an adoptee. I just felt so isolated and alone, but after meeting Hong Kong adoptees I just felt like I wasn\u2019t alone, and I felt more connected. … Yeah, it felt like it was okay to be who I am. I could even be proud of who I am.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Together, this connection to people and place has helped affirm Reese\u2019s identity and belonging. Table 2 shows how HKADs felt more positive about their Hong Kong identity after the trip. In this way, it was not just the existence of and belonging to an HKAD group but the added signifi- cance of being in Hong Kong that helped transform how attendees viewed themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nested subtheme: HK identification card\u2014claiming \u201cbirthright.\u201d. One promin- ent activity to happen during the Gathering was the application for Hong Kong identification cards, a highly bureaucratic process that required many original Hong Kong and U.S. documents and multiple visits to the Immigration Center. There were certainly mixed feelings among HKADs about applying. Three expressed that they were uninterested, as Carly (unknown) stated, \u201cHong Kong was my old life. I am now fully British and happy.\u201d Two lamented that they tried but were unsuccessful, while four said that they were interested but did not have time or the correct docu- ments. Yet, six HKADs earnestly started the process during the trip. Remy (TRA) explained that the \u201cmoral support and applying with others encour- aged me,\u201d and Reese (TRA) started, \u201cto feel more connected to my birth country,\u201d while Penny (TRA) expressed, \u201c[I] don\u2019t want my Hong Kong heritage denied from me.\u201d For these HKADs, the Hong Kong identification card was both a communal expression carried out in a supportive environ- ment and an expression of claiming identity. As Frank (SRA) claimed, \u201c[I want to] verify and claim [my] birthright as [a] Hong Kong citizen and son of the Motherland.\u201d That 12 HKADs out of 28 attendees (excluding the two who lived in Hong Kong) desired to have a Hong Kong ID sug- gests that possessing such a government issued document could have impli- cations for claiming identity and belonging.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: Root tracing1 and im\/possible searches. Of the 17 respondents to the post-Gathering survey who answered about their level of interest in root tracing, only one, Carly (unknown), expressed complete disinterest: \u201cNot interested. My parents live in the UK as far as I\u2019m concerned yes.\u201d This was similar for level of interest in searching for birth family with one<\/p>\n\n\n\n (out of 17 answers) who expressly stated, \u201cNot interested.\u201d Nine have tried to do a birth search, with only one HKAD finding family. A couple con- veyed ambivalence because of the difficult prospects of finding any infor- mation. These ambivalent sentiments capture the middle and all but one of the lowest scores. Most of the respondents, however, were very or newly interested or had already partaken in root tracing, with a few starting the process with ISS-HK at the Gathering. Nicole (SRA), who raised the topic in her interview but did not participate in the post-Gathering survey, stated, \u201cI just want to know something. Any little piece of information is good I think.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nested subtheme: \u201cLocked door.\u201d. Common among many respondents was a<\/p>\n\n\n\n narrative of impossibility. For example, Wendy (TRA) believed that finding<\/p>\n\n\n\n her information was much more difficult\u2014\u201csomething that wasn\u2019t a possi-<\/p>\n\n\n\n bility for me\u201d\u2014than for domestic adoptees in the UK who had their<\/p>\n\n\n\n records. Natalie (SRA) described how she would love to hug, embrace, and<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2<\/p>\n\n\n\n thank her birth mother for providing her the chance for a different life. But she also wondered, \u201cI also feel like, Hong Kong is so big. And how do I know she\u2019s still here?\u201d Others stated it was like \u201ca locked door and no one gave you the key,\u201d where dying would provide a \u201cbetter chance of find- ing my birth mother\u201d (Reese, TRA); \u201cI felt hopeless, like I\u2019m never going to find her\u201d (Penny, TRA); and \u201cbeing told that my records are sealed any- way, to me it was like what\u2019s the use?\u201d (Remy, TRA). For Lana (TRA), her adoptive parents said that both her birth parents were killed in a car crash, \u201cSo I kind of thought well that\u2019s not possible because my mother\u2019s not alive. So, end of story.\u201d All of these statements underscore a narrative of impossibility (and in some cases the secrecy and lies prevalent in closed and transnational adoption) of finding birth parents.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nested subtheme: New possibilities\u2014\u201cI can help you.\u201d. As already noted, root tracing and birth searches are important for many adoptees, and despite the strength of the narrative of impossibility, being with other HKADs in Hong Kong presented a new sense of possibility. HKADs such as Sasha (TRA) realized that there is more information than they had previously known, \u201cYes, because I didn\u2019t realize that after being there at that meeting that ISS Hong Kong was different from ISS United States. I am kind of hopeful that I can maybe just get an address.\u201d This new knowledge was gained through the group session at ISS-HK, where social workers explained the root tracing process, among other things. Moreover, as Nicole (SRA) commented, there was no \u201cbetter place\u201d to look for birth parents than in Hong Kong because \u201cit is really hard to do it on the com- puter and without very many resources.\u201d In Lana\u2019s (TRA) case, she thought<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 21<\/p>\n\n\n\n 22 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n that her mother was dead and did not have any of her papers until very recently. While she \u201cnever had that really strong desire\u201d to find her birth mother before, the trip changed her view: \u201cBut now of course people are talking about it I\u2019m kind of, it\u2019s pricking my consciousness in thinking, \u2018Oh, yeah, maybe.\u2019\u201d Additionally, some HKADs, who had experience or knowledge in the process of root tracing or birth search, were actively assisting their fellow HKADs. Elaine (TRA), who lives in Hong Kong, has tried to be \u201ca support base\u201d for those who are searching, \u201cpointing people in the right direction.\u201d This sort of assistance did not go unnoticed by Beth (TRA): \u201cI just found that everybody was so supportive of everyone …. Many people have said, \u2018Oh I can help you.\u2019\u201d In this way, the usually hyper-individualized process of root tracing and birth searching can become a larger or even collective effort, disrupting predominate narratives of impossibility and indeed creating new narratives of possibility.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Theme: Challenges and benefits of the gathering and returning to Hong Kong<\/p>\n\n\n\n Overall, the return to Hong Kong, attending the Gathering, and the pos- sible search for roots have affected HKADs\u2019 views and feelings about Hong Kong, their identity, and adoption in general. Only one person expressed that it had no effect, \u201cNo, it has not affected my view or my feeling about Hong Kong. It was just nice to go back to my birth country.\u201d Another sur- vey respondent rated the return to Hong Kong as having \u201csomewhat\u201d of an effect, whereas all others (n1\u2044415) seemed to indicate a greater effect that was attributed to sources that included being among fellow HKADs, learn- ing about their past, having deeper connections to Hong Kong, and helping confirm their Chinese and HK identities.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: Difficulties of disclosure. One interesting revelation was that more than a handful of HKADs (n1\u204447) were not fully forthcoming with their adoptive parents about the trip to Hong Kong and\/or their current\/previ- ous desire to search for birth parents. For earlier transnational adoptees, it was common to not talk about birth parents and adoption issues with adoptive parents. At the same time, the absence of conversation continues even for many of today\u2019s adoptees. Part of this is born from adoptees want- ing to protect their adoptive parents (Berge et al., 2006). Four HKADs explicitly expressed sentiments about wanting to be a \u201cgood daughter\u201d by being \u201cloyal\u201d (Sasha, TRA); not \u201churt[ing] my current family\u201d (Beth, TRA); \u201cnot wanting to upset\u201d her mother (Pam); and not wanting to \u201cdishonor\u201d or \u201cupset\u201d his adoptive mother \u201cbecause to me she is my mother\u201d (Frank, SRA). This might also be explained in part because a few HKADs had poor relationships with their adoptive parents. As Remy (TRA) explained, \u201cI was looking for other Hong Kong adoptees and my interest was that I was in<\/p>\n\n\n\n search of other adoptees that had not so good matches of their adoption families, just like I was not matched in a good way.\u201d For three HKADs, the fact of their adoption was hidden from them. For two others, the adoptive parents lied about their history in the name of protection or under the claim of ignorance. Another two HKADs felt fully detached from their adoptive family. Of course, a few HKADs also stated how their adoptive parents were quite supportive (or became supportive later on) of their interests in roots or birth searches.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: \u201cHad it not been for the internet.\u201d. A surprising aspect of this study was how people became connected in the first place. Approximately half of the interviewees (n 1\u20444 10) found other HKADs or the HKAN through online means. There are three different websites that have served different but overlapping purposes of connecting HKADs. We know that the Internet has made connection for young adoptees easier (Cherot, 2006; McKee, 2016), but this shows that older adoptees on their own initiative (and correspondingly with less institutional support) are doing the same. If such online forums did not exist, then the likelihood of HKADs finding other HKADs would presumably decrease dramatically. For Gayle (SRA), connecting to people in person and online seemed impossible, but as she said, it became a calling: \u201cSuddenly, we have all found a group of people that are like us that all belong to the same group and we all can identify.<\/p>\n\n\n\n … For me, I think everybody looks for a purpose of why they have been brought on this earth. For me, I feel this is my calling, this is what I have been brought on this earth to do.\u201d And as she put it, \u201c[HKAN] would not have been possible had it not been for the internet.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Subtheme: \u201cIt\u2019s a kinship.\u201d. Another prominent theme was the expression of family and\/or kinship among other HKADs. As Frank (SRA) articulated:<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s a kinship, and understanding, and it\u2019s a bond that we\u2019re all family of adoptees no matter what home we come from. And we like to just share that experience and try to understand each other and understand ourselves, more importantly why we think and do things in our lives that maybe non-adoptees would not do or would not say.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Expressions by other HKADs of an unconscious \u201cshared history,\u201d \u201ccollective memory,\u201d and being in the \u201csame shoes\u201d (Lana, TRA); having a \u201ccommon background\u201d (Wendy, TRA); being \u201cmissing sisters and brothers\u201d (Beth) or \u201corphanage sisters\u201d that have \u201cdeep bonds\u201d (Vanessa, SRA); and sharing \u201csisterhood and brotherhood\u201d (Jackeline, SRA; Teresa, TRA) hap- pened simultaneously with being physically present in Hong Kong. This bolstered the connections of kinship based on common experiences and sufferings as well as transformative attachments to a common place. This study has revealed the importance for Hong Kong adoptees to connect<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 23<\/p>\n\n\n\n 24 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n with other HKADs. Vanessa (SRA) remarked that finding other HKADs \u201chas deeply affected me in words I can\u2019t even describe,\u201d and as Penny (TRA) explained, \u201cWe are searching for the wrong people, not parents, we really should be searching for each other.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Discussion<\/p>\n\n\n\n Returning to the place of birth and finding one\u2019s origins are both experien- ces that can be associated with the developmental stages of generativity ver- sus stagnation as well as identity versus isolation (Erikson, 1968). These stages are typically associated with very different tasks; however, for adult adoptees, identity is a particularly compelling and lifelong journey. The generativity versus stagnation period of life, however, is typically associated with middle to later adulthood. Within the literature on adult adoptees, few studies focus upon adoptees during this latter life stage. The findings of this study should be considered within the context of these life stages and how they are not separate but can \u201coverlap in different ways\u201d (Erikson & Erikson, 1981, p. 267).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Our findings indicated that although all the HKADs from our study who were, for the most part, from an older generation than other transnational adoptee gathering participants, had found their ways to Hong Kong in the years before this Gathering, the HKAD Gathering itself seemed to lead to modest increases in the attendees\u2019 HKAD identities. The findings of this study demonstrate that having an event that brings adoptees with similar origin stories together in their birthplace served as a source of support for these adoptees in their generative years. Interestingly, the increased comfort with their HKAD identities after the Gathering did not translate into a similar increase in their comfort with being Chinese.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Other findings suggest that the high level of interest in birth search and Hong Kong residence status was likely to be somewhat influenced by the Gathering. As noted above, our sample of HKADs were primarily in their 50s and several had never initiated a serious birth parent search nor had they applied for Hong Kong residency status until their experiences with the Gathering. Based on these findings, we can speculate that the HKADs may want to culturally socialize (Shiao & Tuan, 2008) and reculturate (Baden et al., 2012) in these specific ways (i.e., embrace and reclaim aspects of their birth identity and culture through seeing Hong Kong, searching for birth family, or applying for their Hong Kong I.D. as opposed to learning the language, for example). Additionally, they may cognitively separate their Hong Kong adoptee and Chinese identities. The internalization of the meaning behind being a Hong Konger, Chinese, and mainland Chinese could be further explored for HKADs.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Those who attended (and completed pre- and post-Gathering surveys) reported significant increases in their comfort with their identities as HKADs, suggesting that visiting Hong Kong and attending the Gathering may have been influential. Being with peer HKADs in the place of their birth while experiencing Hong Kong, sometimes for the first time, likely impacted their comfort with their status as HKADs. We speculate that, like many transnational adoptees who report mixed feelings\u2014both con- nected to and disconnected (McGinnis et al., 2009) from their birth coun- tries\u2014HKADs in our study benefited from being with others who shared their mixed feelings and their feelings of being foreign in their birth country. In other words, this collective in-birthplace experience may help cultural socialization (Shiao & Tuan, 2008) and reculturation (Baden et al., 2012) more so than solo or non-adoptee-group reculturative experiences.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Our qualitative analysis of the data revealed that HKADs attended the Gathering for many reasons, the most common being to meet, connect, and \u201cbe\u201d with other HKADs. This mirrored Freundlich and Lieberthal\u2019s (2000) study that found KADs wanted to meet and learn about the experi- ences of other KADs. HKADs also revealed that they experienced isolation, alienation, and racism while growing up, which were also found to be true in the 2000 and 2010 studies (Freundlich & Lieberthal, 2000; Park Nelson et al., 2013). Nearly, all of the respondents (n1\u2044420) grew up not knowing another HKAD outside of an adopted sibling (n 1\u20444 6), and the vast majority did not know another transracial adoptee (n 1\u20444 16). In the majority of cases, HKADs had not met another HKAD until connecting with the HKAN. While we did not specifically ask if the latter is linked to the desire to meet and connect with other HKADs, we suspect this to be the case. Research shows that most transnational adoptees have grown up in isolated environ- ments (Park Nelson, 2016) and want to meet other adoptees like them (Baden, 2015; Myers, 2019). This differs from Erikson\u2019s (1968) understand- ing of isolation, which is a result of lack of partner intimacy rather than lack of social belonging. Additionally, HKADs experienced deep and vary- ing emotions that were linked to being in a large group with other HKADs in Hong Kong. Baden (2015) has shown being in the same space as others who counteract this formative or even life-long experience of isolation pro- vides a positive adoptee socialization experience and significant impact. Importantly, a couple HKADs wanted to learn of other HKADs\u2019 \u201cstruggle[s]\u201d and meet \u201cother adoptees that had not so good matches of their adoption families.\u201d While they may appear as outliers, their interests bring nuance to show that the experiences of HKADs are more complex than the positive narratives that adoption discourse often portrays (Myers, 2014).<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 25<\/p>\n\n\n\n 26 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Many HKADs (n1\u204449) explicitly mentioned feeling out of place or lack- ing a connection to Hong Kong either now or in previous visits (see also \u201cIdentify with Hong Kong\u201d in Table 2), which is similar to the 2000 Gathering study, reporting 22 percent of KADs who had returned to Korea had a negative experience. Some KADs also expressed that Korea felt like a distant and foreign place (Freundlich & Lieberthal, 2000). Yet, HKADs also articulated an appreciation for visiting former orphanage sites, which reveals an interesting relationship between the lack of connec- tion to an \u201cexisting\u201d and present Hong Kong on the one hand and a dis- appeared but experienced orphanage on the other. In other words, visiting the orphanage site viscerally rooted the experience of HKADs in ways that simply visiting Hong Kong has\/does not. Reflecting similar findings as the quantitative results with regard to identity and belonging, HKADs also articulated how the Gathering helped reveal the unstated yet common history and understanding of each other, which affirmed their Hong Kong identity and belonging. The latter is something shown to be true in other contexts of adoptee birth country travel (Bergquist, 2004). Despite identity being an earlier stage in Erikson\u2019s (1968) life cycle, the quantitative and qualitative data appear to show that identity remains important for HKADs into their generativity stage and possibly holds more salience with the simultaneous group activities of meeting other HKADs, returning to Hong Kong, visiting orphanages, and attempting to obtain Hong Kong identification cards.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Our research also reveals that although HKADs expressed the \u201cnarrative of impossibilities\u201d as well as the difficult realities of root tracing and birth search, being with other HKADs gave many attendees hope to find infor- mation about themselves or their family, which was reflected in quantitative findings of increased interest in birth search. Learning more about their personal past and imagining new possibilities of connecting to birth family reshapes how they might understand their identity. Moreover, HKADs expressed ideas of family and kinship beyond biological and adoptive, often calling other HKADs sisters and brothers. A broad notion of kinship is useful here. Sahlins (2013) argues that kinship is a \u201cmutuality of being,\u201d and in the context of transnational\/racial adoption, kinship could then seemingly hold consanguineal (biological); \u201cfictive,\u201d social, and chosen (i.e., adoptive relations and adoptee relationships with other adoptees); and geo- graphical (connections to homeland) ties. Connections such as these are no longer imagined or impossible but significantly attached to people, com- mon experience, and place. This relates back to Erikson\u2019s (1974) notion of generativity that is not just about producing children but the\u201cestablishment, the guidance, and the enrichment of the living generation and the world it inherits\u201d (p. 123). This HKAD group has\u2014through<\/p>\n\n\n\n creating an online and in-person community\u2014has established a form of peer adoptive kinship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Earlier studies on KAD Gatherings centered demographics, identity, adoptive experiences, birth search, and to a small extent reasons for attend- ing the gatherings (Freundlich & Lieberthal, 2000; Park Nelson et al., 2013). Similarly, the only recent study on Hong Kong adoptees centered early adoption and life span experiences (Feast et al., 2013). Our research examined these areas to an extent, but it is significant because the Gathering was not just the site of the study but the object of study, specif- ically focusing on reasons why HKADs attended the Gathering, their expe- riences at the Gathering, and other significant elements related to the Gathering. In this way, this research is similar to emergent research on cul- ture camps and adoptee community building. Facilitators from the 1999 Gathering noted that the Gathering was a time for \u201chealing and sharing\u201d(Freundlich & Lieberthal, 2000, p. 23). We believe this to hold true for the 2015 HKAD Gathering. Going back \u201chome\u201d to their birth country, orphan- age sites, and even back to their current home (after the Gathering) impacted their identity, sense of belonging, and familial connections to other HKADs, where HKADs shared connections, stories, experiences, tips, laughter, tears, and bonds of kinship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Limitations<\/p>\n\n\n\n Though this research study provides a rich in-depth exploration of the experience of HKADs who have returned to their home country, some lim- itations are worth noting. A limitation for any qualitative study is the small sample size and the inability to generalize the findings. However, phenom- enological studies typically have sample sizes of about 10\u201314 participants (Hays & Singh, 2011; Merriam & Tisdell, 2015). While this study employs a mixed methodological approach, and provides both qualitative and quan- titative data, the sample lacked power within the quantitative analysis. Nonetheless, the quantitative results effectively contributed to the reported lived experiences of participants. The generalizability of this study is further limited by several factors also including the small sample size of the study. Given the expenses related to traveling to Hong Kong for this Gathering, HKADs who did not have the resources for international travel from Europe or North America likely limited the participation among HKADs. In addition, HKADs who did participate may not be representative of the socioeconomic status of all HKADs. Conclusions regarding the differences between pre- and post-Gathering were explored using a survey that had only four items on which to compare their responses to the Gathering.<\/p>\n\n\n\n ADOPTION QUARTERLY 27<\/p>\n\n\n\n 28 K. MYERS ET AL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Furthermore, not all attendees completed both the pre- and post-Gathering surveys leading to different sample sizes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Implications for research and practice<\/p>\n\n\n\n Overall, the findings of this study add to our understanding of HKADs, an understudied cohort of transnational adoptees. Prior to this study, the only research with this population focused on HKADs who had been adopted to the UK, whereas our findings include HKADs who were adopted to the USA, U.K., Hong Kong, and Canada. Additionally, this study is one of the first to explore transnational adoptees, the majority of whom were in their 50s and 60s, who were in the generativity stage of development (Erikson, 1968). The adoptees in our study differed from other transnational adoptee groups who were adopted during the transnational adoption boom from the early-1990s to the mid-2000s for multiple reasons. First, the participants in our study grew up during the decades when representations of Asians in the media or the presence of Asians in their communities were minimal in their adopted countries. Second, HKADs adopted in the 1960s grew up for the first half of their lives without the Internet and the means to connect to other HKADs. Third, HKADs of this generation grew up in times when many adoptive parents did not get training prior to adopting and when their small numbers resulted in isolation within their communities. Fourth, there was little if any focus on post-adoption services for adoptees, espe- cially adult adoptees. These differences prompt us to consider not only how adoption practices can change to benefit younger adoptees but also what would be useful for transnational and transracial adult adoptees in their later life stages.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Our study\u2019s focus on HKADs\u2019 identity as well as their reasons for attend- ing, experiences, and significance of the Gathering in their birth country provided important insight into the value of adoptee gatherings. The HKAD Gathering provided the opportunity for the HKADs to join in a community of peers and even for the HKADs who did not engage in cul- tural socialization or reculturative practices, it served as a form of adoptee socialization, which Baden (2015) defines as a \u201cprocess by which adoptees gain a sense of themselves as adopted persons and develop a degree of comfort with their adoptive histories\u201d (p. 28). Empirical investigation of adoption socialization should also be studied to better understand the nuances of adoptee socialization and gatherings, specifically adult-adoptee- only spaces (i.e., without the presence of the adoptive family). Future research should further explore HKADs with respect to their developmental life stages and how adoption impacts them as they move into older adult- hood. The intersection of adoption, race, and migration come together in<\/p>\n\n\n\n HKADs, and research studying their experiences and developmental experi- ences can benefit our understanding of other transnational adoptees.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The implications of this study on practice inform the practice of adop- tion and clinical practice. This study underscores the importance of return- ing to one\u2019s birth country. But more significantly, it highlights for agencies and adoptive parents the importance of cultural socialization, reculturation, and adoptee socialization in a group setting with other adult adoptees (not just with adoptive family), and how attaching such experiences to particular places (e.g., orphanages or finding sites) can engender greater meaning and fulfillment than tourist trips back to one\u2019s birth country. Additionally, the kinship felt by attendees reinforces the importance of training adoptive parents to provide adoption communities and racial ethnic communities through which their children can find connections. Clinical practice can also benefit from training practitioners to recognize the importance of these socialization experiences. Clinicians can support adoptees in their efforts to socialize as adoptees and as members of their racial ethnic communities. Future research can target best clinical practices to support adoptee social- ization and other identity tasks. Furthermore, attempts at and newfound interest in birth search (even at such a late stage) indicate the importance of avoiding narrowly defined concepts of family and kinship. This points to the potential utility of broader notions of kinship that include not only birth family but also bonds with other adoptees.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Epilogue<\/p>\n\n\n\n We realize it is uncommon to have an epilogue in a journal article, but we want to make two important notes. First, we want to acknowledge that one of the participants passed away shortly after the Gathering. Kacy had breast cancer, which was in remission during the trip, but aggressively returned upon arriving home. She is missed dearly by the HKAN group. Second, with the help of Hong Kong media, another participant\u2014who wishes to be unnamed even by pseudonym\u2014connected with her birth family after the Gathering. 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University of Chicago Press. 240X(200008)23:4<334::AID-NUR9>3.0.CO;2-G ation. American Journal of Sociology, 113(4), 1023\u20131066. https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1086\/522807 Special to The New York Times. (1962, Jun 21). 40 to 50 Hong Kong orphans will come to U.S. New York Times, p. 5. https:\/\/search.proquest.com\/docview\/115631327?accountid=<\/p>\n\n\n\n 14515 American family. University of Pennsylvania Press. research. In C. J. Sheperis, J. S. Young, & M. H. Daniels (Eds.), Counseling research: Quantitative, qualitative, and mixed methods (2nd ed., pp. 215\u2013231). Pearson.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Kit Myersa, Amanda L. Badenb, and Alfonso Fergusona\u2020aUniversity of California Merced, Merced, California, USA; bMontclair State University, Montclair, California, USA ABSTRACT This mixed-methods study examines 20 adult Hong Kong Adoptees (HKADs) with an average age of 53.7years who attended a Gathering … Continue reading
\u2020Present address: Centenary University, Hackettstown, New Jersey
” 2020 Taylor & Francis Group, LLC<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
n1\u2044414a n1\u204446b n1\u2044420c<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Chinese
Chinese
Chinese
Chinese
British Hong Kong Chinese Adoptee British<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
Mean age
Female
Male
Mean Age at adoption Adopted sibling from Asia Non-adopted sibling Adopted country<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hong Kong Canada<\/p>\n\n\n\n
7%<\/p>\n\n\n\n
49.8
83% 92% 17% 8%<\/p>\n\n\n\n
67% 29% 40% 50%<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
aHKAD attendees who completed pre- and post-Gathering surveys and an interview.
bHKAD attendees who completed the pre-Gathering survey and an interview but did complete the post-<\/p>\n\n\n\n
cKAD attendees who completed the pre-Gathering survey and an interview.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
Positive Feelings About<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Anxiety About Attending<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Success of Gathering Comfort with Identity as<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Interest in Applying for<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Positive Feelings about<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
<\/figure>\n\n\n\n
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